How to find your Voice and Build Confidence
February 16, 2023
I used to burn out all the time. I had a goal. I would overwork myself to the point I couldn’t work anymore. I took time off to recover. Then I would get back to overworking myself. And burning out again and again.
On the outside I looked like I was just this super hard-working girl, doing all the things, and somehow keeping it together. But on the inside, it was quite the opposite. I was constantly exhausted, frustrated, and fried.
I really wanted to break this cycle, but I never felt like I could find the key to stop getting burnt out. It wasn’t for lack of trying either. I had been in therapy for about 5 years and had read countless articles, and watched many youtube videos.
The epiphany I had was in realizing that these things, therapy, articles, and youtube videos, only approached burnout from one area. Logic.
In therapy when I was burnt out my therapist would say “it is okay” “it happens” “no need to be hard on yourself.”
The articles and videos I would look at shared advice that was all-time oriented. Like new styles of planners and to-do lists. Or it would be about time blocking. Even about how many hours to work or structuring your day to not burn out.
The key to consistently preventing burnout
What I finally realized was that burnout needed to be tackled through much more than logic.
I realized that I needed to be in balance with my feminine and masculine energy.
Feminine energy: intuition, emotion, body, receptivity, wide focus, fluidity, and rest.
Masculine energy: logic, cognition, spirit, forcing, singular focus, structure, and action.
When you are a hard worker with lofty goals you spend a lot of time in your masculine energy hustling, thinking, grinding, and making things happen.
Being hesitant about this balance…
I’m not going to lie… when I first started leaning into my feminine energy it felt weird and wrong. Guilty thoughts like “this isn’t going to help me get closer to my dreams,” and “this is not productive ran through my head.
But the more I incorporated feminine energy habits into my heavy masculine life the more I was able to recover and actively stop getting burnt out all the time.
I now have flow in my life. Unexpected roadblocks don’t throw me like they used to. I am both well-rested and a sharper thinker.
How to maintain your balance between feminine and masculine energy to stop getting burnt out all the time
Let your intuition guide you
What did humankind have before the internet, school, media, and other informational resources? We had intuition. We used our intuition to guide us.
Our intuition is so powerful when it comes to decision-making. Logic certainly has its place. But what do we do when we have gathered all the information we can in the time we have? Listen to our gut.
The more we learn to trust ourselves and go with our gut the less we will overthink and overconsume information when making a decision.
Honor and release your emotions
If we want to stop getting burnt out all the time there is likely a goal we are working towards that is burning us out all the time. Consistency is key to achieving goals, but the biggest block in maintaining consistency is our emotions.
We are working towards something and then *bam* something triggers a strong emotional response within. We are possibly stunted, frustrated, insecure, or overwhelmed.
To move through these blocks we must let ourselves feel our emotions to heal our wounds. Otherwise, we will continually be triggered and fall down by similar situations.
The more we can honor our emotions the better cognitive thinkers we will be. We will have the clarity and groundedness to discern, perceive, and move forward.
Listen and respond to your body’s needs
When we are always overworking ourselves we kind of move up out of our body and into our head, metaphorically speaking. We start ignoring our needs and spirit through to “get more done.” Even though, ironically, we are likely getting less done because we are not at 100%.
Listen to what your body needs and make that happen. Food, exercise, bathroom breaks, rest, etc.
Pausing then listening and responding to your body’s needs will help you get high-quality work done faster.
Be receptive to other’s thoughts
We are always trying to force our way to the top. We get exhausted always trying to be the one that provided the best solution. To do this we stop listening to others. And then we get burnt out because we have stopped learning.
When we listen to others’ ideas it helps inspire our own unique thoughts and solutions.
At the end of the day, we are all beautifully unique. Being open to the perspectives of others will help us form more thoughtful solutions.
Plus the practice of listening to as many perspectives as possible and then forming your own unique values builds confidence.
Always focus on the big picture
Never lose sight of this.
It is so easy to get hyper-focused. Whether it is with our career, finances, dating, fitness, or other goals. Every small step can feel like a huge deal.
The more we can be kind to ourselves on our journey to our goals the faster our goals will materialize.
We have to remember every small step towards a goal is valid. AND that loving ourselves is the best thing we can do when we don’t get something done.
Practice fluidity
Structure is very important in our society. The businesses we either own or work for could not exist without it.
But we are human. Constantly learning and evolving beings.
If we become rigid in our planning we will get frustrated and burn out.
Allowing yourself to be flexible, especially when things don’t go as planned, will help you continue moving forward toward your dreams.
Allow yourself to rest, even when you don’t think you “deserve” it
Rest and action go hand in hand. Resting our mind and body will allow us the energy we need to take action toward our goals.
This of course includes sleep but it also includes actively resting your mind. It is about doing things you enjoy, for the sake of enjoying them to give your mind a break.
This is why making time for hobbies is mandatory to prevent burnout.
Getting started with all of this:
If the idea of getting started with all this seems daunting or even impossible. I get it. I was in your shoes not that long ago.
For this reason, I offer free Discovery Calls. This is where you can share your journey with burnout and your goals for overcoming it. And I can share how I might be able to help you out.
You can apply for a Discovery Call here.